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» Glory! 108 Comment
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ShadowSplicer on We don’t think that slog… ShadowSplicer on We don’t think that slog… jinxed on We don’t think that slog… person on Of what? Is this continued on … jinxed on We don’t think that slog… ShadowSplicer on Should we eat somewhere e… jinxed on We don’t think that slog… ShadowSplicer on Of what? Is this continued on … Random on Of what? Is this continued on … Kame09 on Of what? Is this continued on … 
Cheezburger Network Blog
Sooo..we should cherish our butts?
I cherish mine, since sitting would be very difficult otherwise.
LMAO YES!!!!
LMFAO
I IZ SMAPING SPAMING SPAMING SPAMING SPAMING SPAMING !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!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GTFO
take your smapping somewhere else.
GET OWNED
What sequence of events could have possibly led to this sign?
The Japanese really want people to stop smoking. It’s difficult, because the vast majority of adults do. You may have seen the famous, “The cool cowboy flicks his cigarette into the gutter. But he lives in an old movie.” There was also the one I saw that said, “I flicked my cigarette into the gutter. I hid my shame in the gutter.”
It’s more or less a really extensive guilt trip campaign.
lol so true
This poster is actually one of a series of Japanese anti smoking posters, all of which feature green pictograms on a white background, and a poetic tagline.
Putting a term like: Japanese anti smoking into google images returns heaps of examples.
I have a pic of a similar sign myself from my trip to japan!
you went to japan?!?!!?! i’ve ALWAYS wanted to go! you are soooo luky!! >.<
It sounds more like an anti-littering campaign, for some reason…
Some further research led to me discovering that this is in fact a smokers
ettique campaign being run by Japan Tobbacco (Look up Japan Tobbaco
on wiki)
Yeah, I also thought it was an anti-littering sign.
STFU!!!!!!!!!!
NO U!!!!1!
Hmm, i could take first… but instead will say this…For Engrish, this actually makes a lot of sense!
Ah, too late for a “first” anyways.
It’s not really Engrish – it’s a perfect translation. I wouldn’t have it any other way.
The falling cherry blossoms add a piquant touch…
but what’s it actually about?
Piquant? How is the cherry blossom spicy? I think you might mean “poignant”.
I think you’re thinking of Picante.
Piquant can mean stimulating to the pallate, but in this use I’m assuming it is the other meaning, which is lively or interesting.
er.. Palate*
–adjective 1. agreeably pungent or sharp in taste or flavor; pleasantly biting or tart: a piquant aspic.
2. agreeably stimulating, interesting, or attractive: a piquant glance.
3. of an interestingly provocative or lively character: a piquant wit.
4. Archaic. sharp or stinging, esp. to the feelings.
see so you were using it correctly, they just didnt see all the meanings
The blossoms? They’re THE fundamental symbol of transience to the Japanese (since they are pretty, but last only about 2 weeks).
The sign? Just tries to get people to stop smoking.
I don’t understand why this should be considered English. The English makes perfect grammatical sense, and is an accurate translation of what the Japanese says. It’s trying to both discourage smoking and the indiscriminate throwing around of butts, since Japan is really hard on litterers. Sure it’s funny, but more because of what it says than it actually being “Engrish.”
agreed. unlike the cowboy ad in the same anti-littering series, this one is actually well-written.
Well….”it were” is not correct English, it’s “it was”. But I totally agree that this is not Engrish. It is funny, yes, but that’s the whole point, and the translation is correct too.
Sorry, but it’s actually correct. Look up “conditional case.”
On the topic, I really wish fewer Japanese would smoke. Nothing ruins a nice evening at an izikaya quicker than the chain-smoker at the next table.
“If it were…” is correct in this case.
YES ITS TRUE!! It’s called the present UNREAL conditional tense. Look it up in any grammar book.
Engrish Fail!
I second the Fail!
Turded!
This is pure poetry!
Agreed.
I think the illustrations are hilarious.
Likewise, particularly the person-cigarette clinch and the blossoms/bird detail.
And some for the birds friend, don’t forget.
Not a bad translation…it just doesn’t really pertain to anything important. Just some poetic info about the life of a cigarette…
the middle icon totally looks like the cig is getting it up the ass. so this is a really cute stop smoking campaign or an illustration of my last 2 dates.
also the bird could care less, srsly.
i think that may be a haiku…
Nope. Syllable count does not fit.
Brazzy, you’re just too funny for your own good.
i think that was more just interesting, not a hilarious-ly poor translation. not sure it’s engrish but still good.
Looks like the bird is thinking of going in for sloppy seconds
I wish I knew how to quit you!
Brilliant!
Is that the bird whose friend all you dreadful males were planning to do? Is it now the case that we find out that the “friend” was a 5′ cigarette? Ha! Serves you right.
Is it a haiku in the original Japanese? The syllable count got lost in translation. But never to fear! I have a great deal of studying to procrastinate from doing, so here is my effort to re-haiku-ize it:
Sucked. Burned. Thrown away.
Were it not a cigarette,
surely it would cry.
No, it’s not a haiku in the original Japanese. The romanized transliteration would be as such:
Suwarete. Moete. Suterarete.
Tabako jya nakereba naiteiru.
You have the original Japanese, and counting syllables is really easy: each full-size character is one syllable (possible more than one for kanji, but rarely more than two, and not in this case).
Just because haiku are one of the few Japanese things Westerners know doesn’t mean any remotely poetic Japanese text has to be a haiku.
No, but it’s fun to try.
Clarification for the literal: it’s fun to try and make it into haiku (loosely defined – pedantry not necessary). Hey, it’s fun to make any thing into haiku, and for some reason, translations seem to often lend themselves to this. That it includes a bird and sakura is just a bonus.
Japanese culture
goes far beyond mere haiku.
Clueless westerners!
I don’t want to be “that” person, but is this even a translation error??
I mean, reading it didn’t even make me wonder what language it was coming from, because it made perfect sense to me!
…
Oh god, I just realized what this makes me…
It makes me deeply sad that someone thought this was Engrish and that some of you can’t figure out what it means.
They must have missed what is completely clear as day.
This can not be considered “Engrish” as there are no grammatical errors.
Well one part could be considered in error. I would change the first line to “Inhaled, burned, and thrown away.” but still it wouldn’t be grammatically correct. Aside from that this is a clear sentence which is communicating the irony of a person’s addiction to smoking, by relating it to loving something.
well…”it were” is not correct. “it WAS”
But I agree…not Engrish
“If it were” is a perfectly correct example of the “conditional” tense in English, in which you are expressing something that is purely theoretical. For example, Joe Smith actually was a teacher, but is now in real estate, and he is not sure whether he was a teacher when he vacationed in New Zealand. He can properly say, “If I WAS a teacher [at that time], I don’t know how I afforded the trip to New Zealand.” Jim Brown never was a teacher. He would say, “If I WERE a teacher, I’d never have been able to afford that trip to New Zealand.” So to say, “If it were anything but a cigarette” means that of course, a cigarette could never be anything else but a cigarette, so this is strictly hypothetical.
It’s called “subjunctive” and it’s a mood, not a tense. In an “If [pronoun] were…” sentence, the tense is past and the mood is subjunctive.
I like the way the japanese seem to understand the subtleties of the subjunctive more than native Engrish speakers
Still,that bird WIN! What that bird got to do with anything?LOL
I think that’s win.
I need a better reason to kick the golden butt
falling madly in love with nicotine
Someone should come up with a Panic reference right about now.
i’d laugh if someone tried to put this up in germany…
Brokeback cigarette wishes you would quit him?
I have query about posting times, help from others appreciated….ahh, stuff it, I speak Estuary English well good. Anyway: does every single contributing keyboardist live in Japan, or something? The time markers for posts are at unearthlily early hours, for a GMT dweller. If you’re in a State, then you must be contributing yesterday, which begins to get a bit confusing. Does everyone have industrial quantities of modafinil, or something?
Hang on…..brainfail…..the clock’s set for EST innit? Is it?
Aussies, NewZies, and college students, all.
What’s the problem? Seems like a new pic is posted about every 6 hours, and it’s not Breaking News. You aiming to be a serial Firster or what?
There are definitely some Seppos in here. The timing thing means presumably that even the picture wrangler has nights when he can’t sleep terribly well.
What’s he doing to that cigarette?
The same thing cigarettes have been doing to people for years, I hope!
I have been quit for 4 Months, 2 Days, 2 hours, 47 minutes and 46 seconds (122 days). I have saved $592.25 by not smoking 2,442 cigarettes. I have saved 1 Week, 1 Day, 11 hours and 30 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 11/19/2008 8:00 PM
Congrats kimholder. One of the best decisions you’ll make in your life
This seems to be written in perfect English.
Actually, I’m fairly sure that “if it were” is correct. It’s difficult for me to explain, but “if” changes something about whether you use “were” or “was.”
I mean, it’s generally accepted that you say “If I were ____…,” so this is probably the same.
If I’m wrong, please don’t gang up on me! Just throwing in my friendly two cents here.
Plus… -pokes name-
…I have a lightsaber.
XD
You are correct–it’s called the subjunctive mood, and is used, among other things, to express hypothetical statements that are contrary to fact.
While the subjunctive is used frequently, the subjunctive mood in English has in many cases taken on the same form as the simple past. For example:
When I had $1000, I bought a new computer. (“had” is past indicative; that is, I had the money at one point in time and bought a computer)
If I had $1000, I would buy a new computer (“had” is past subjunctive; that is, it is a conditional statement about what I would do with $1000)
Another use is to directly express the wishes of another person. E.g.:
John takes a break every hour. (“takes” is present indicative)
The boss demanded that John not take a break every hour. (“take” is present subjunctive)
AAAARGH! I’m having conjugation flashbacks now – AAAAARGH!
It’s a conditional statement, as noted before, which requires the subjunctive tense of a verb.
Bend over and think of England.
What is the sound of one cigarette crying?
Same sound as a T falling in the alphabet when no one’s around.
Brilliant.
This is almost artistic in quality.
Such poetry.
This doesn’t really qualify as Engrish…it’s spelled right and grammatically correct…but it does qualify as funny XD
Ahh……so the SMORKING process is finally revealed.
That’s actually perfect English, it’s the poetic part you don’t get.
I like the quirky ads in this series. Strictly speaking there’s no Engrish here, as the English is perfect if sometimes a tad… quaint? Poetic? Affected? The cultural clash is reminiscent of a sign written in Engrish, so I can see why these get included here. Strictly speaking they don’t belong, but I feel no need to complain.
This isn’t funny
i remain.
I don’t really see the humor in this one.
This is not engrish. And the translation is correct.
Engrishfunny fail.
lol i love you joe and nick but not you kevenyou
Meet…love…the end… Sounds like the poor Weighted Companion Cube.
I feel all sad now.
so all ciggies are women? hence cigar-ettes?
sounds like a hooker
*puff*
That seems to be pretty good English to me. It is also proof of why the Japanese are made of win in every way.
This belongs in the wtf category, but I think the illustration (with its text – meet, love, the end) does fit the Engrish requirements.
IMO, the fact that the English text IS grammatically correct and makes sense makes the sign that much funnier.
Aahaha. I saw one of these when I climbed Mt Fuji last summer. It was pretty great. There was another one that said something else, but I forgot what it was.
someone likes their cigarettes…..
I thought this was about why you shouldn’t have one night stands?