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Paris Hilton cooks?



engrish funny crab dust

crab cooks whore dust

Submitted by: Ohohcita via Engrish Funny Submissions

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» Glory! 43 Comment

  1. Jennifer says:

    In Soviet Russia, crabs have Paris Hilton…

  2. adam says:

    First!

  3. JohnB says:

    I can’t decide which would sound more appetizing, a crab cooking wh0re dust, or a wh0re cooking crab dust…

  4. JohnB says:

    Now a dusty wh0re cooking crab sounds oddly familiar, like something that might have happened during one of those great times I can’t remember…

  5. Jennifer says:

    “We’re all out of whore dust, I can’t make any more of that crab dish!”

    “Don’t worry, the crematorium says Lindsay Lohan is almost done and they’ll have her shipped here within the hour.”

    “Well, OK…but that’s probably only enough for about ten dishes.”

  6. MeowTseTongue says:

    ::camera pans through a busy restaurant towards the kitchen::

    We see a giant crab, (wearing a chef hat natürlich) , his eyestalks moving furiously, uses his claws to deftly flip some fried whore dust in the air like an omelete.

    The mixture lands with precision in the center of the pan, as he adds a sprig of parsley and pours the contents over some veal he prepared.

    A food runner grabs the savory plate from the shelf..

    • JohnB says:

      I’m trying to figure out why wh0re dust would be more appealing than the dust of any ordinary human. Perhaps the layers of makeup add extra color?

      • MeowTseTongue says:

        I think the idea is that wh0res have crabs, hence the creature of similar namesake cooks them.

        ..Thus, um.. ah crap, i was trying to go for another analogy where X cooks Y because Y has X, but i can’t think of anything.

        HELP?

        • JohnB says:

          Certainly the little buggers called crabs were a risk when consorting with women of ill repute in the old days, but in these days where shaving seems to be the norm, if the p0rn I have seen is to be believed, and I would think this makes a much less convivial environment for crabs. Surely there are some crabby wh0res, but that must be primarily when they are off duty, since anyone whose income depends upon public relations skills of any sort learns to be friendly and charming rather quickly.

  7. JohnB says:

    From the Department of Facts You Really Wish You Didn’t Know: Humans do produce quite a bit of dust, which serves as the primary diet for little microscopic creatures called dust mites, with which you are crawling at this very instant. Of course, there’s lots more to be found in your bed, since each night you sleep you leave a veritable all-you-can-eat buffet for the little buggers.

    • mojojo says:

      MMMM buffet! What is it, 20% of ur pillow/matress is dust mites(alive or dead) and their um…business? I try not to think about it.

      But considering the histroy of the bed, we’ve still come a long way. We don’t have to use a bedstaff to knock out vermin before going to sleep.

      And we don’t have to really “make” our beds anew everynight.

      • Basara says:

        It’s those teeny little dust mite
        Ultra-tiny dust mites
        ’bout 2 million in the average bed
        bunches of them dust mites
        teeny-tiny dust mites
        snuggled safe and warm beneath your head…

        (or something like that – trying to remember lyrics from memory)
        - Heywood Banks, “Dust Mites”

        (heywood can be heard occasionally on the Bob & Tom show, Comedy Central, and comedy clubs across the Midwest.

  8. Darkailleam says:

    This is one of those statements that make me wonder what they meant originally… I mean in the mind of the person who wrote it…

    • BB says:

      Actually the Thai words say “Poo Pad Pong KAREE” (crab in curry sauce) KAREE = curry but also a slang for whore LMAO

  9. Jessica says:

    No…it’s ‘crab cooks, whore dust’. The crab is preparing dinner while she’s cleaning the living room!

  10. lunamorgan says:

    Saw what you will about Paris Hilton. She’s a marketing genius. Everyone with a television or internet access knows who she is. She’s done t.v., movies, CDs, and gets invited to every major party. If you actually watch her, she occasionally says weirdly intelligent and insightful stuff which makes me suspect she’s of at least average IQ and is just using the ditz thing to her advantage. No one cares about a well behaved hotel heiress. Everyone remembers a loopy, hard-partying one.

    • JohnB says:

      In the age of all-pervasive media spinmeisters and a public with an unlimited salacious interest in anybody “famous,” no one ever knows who anybody really is.

  11. becky says:

    So the crab does the cooking and the whore does the dusting? What a lovely couple, lol

  12. Droll not Troll says:

    If you say it fast enough, you get “crab cook saw dust”. I realise that doesn’t make any more sense, but there’s no translation yet….

  13. Julie Pee says:

    If you plug this into Word Reference for Korean, it translates it back to “soft-shell crab”.

  14. Leona Helmsley says:

    Leona’s last words were…

  15. Schooly says:

    Jeez oh Pete, leave women alone. Yes, even Paris. I don’t care how she acts or looks; stop using her to make whore jokes. It discourages the rest of us from acting provacative, dummy!

  16. Irene says:

    Wonder what the PIMP does??? lol


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