Well, at least the food is hot
Steamboat C*m Restaurant
Submitted by: Karis Law + James Ditchem + Brittany Law via Engrish Funny Submissions
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Maybe they’re talking about the Latin “with”?
“Steamboat with restaurant”
Maybe they serve Chinese-Latin food.
Interesting concept. Eggrolls with Enchilada sauce, anyone? Or perhaps some General Tso’s Nachos?
Chow mein con carne!
Chow mein cum carne.
How ’bout some Chimichanga Chow Mein?
Moogoogai-pan? Haha, no PAN intended!!!
Dleadful Pan Fairy has been notified of your transgression – stay alert for the surreptitious flapping of wings.
Not that sort of Latin, silly. Geez, you see what happens when they stop teaching the classics in secondary school?
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OH!!!…THAT kind of Latin! I have degrees in physics and engineering, so everything was in Greek.
How about Cogito ergo dim sum?
…or in this case, cogito ergo cum.
Sum cogito dimmer than others.
Cogito ergo doleo. (I think, therefore I am depressed)
Have you tried going incogito?
Exactly what I thought too; what’s unusual about a ship that exists primarily as a mobile restaurant?
Ah, I see you’ve been to the “Titanic” restaurant in Geelong, VIC. It sinks every hour, on the hour.
Oh yeah, another thing about Malaysian is that the mode of Chinese dining where a pot of boiling water is provided at the table for diners to dunk raw morsels in is called “steamboat”. I believe it’s called “hot pot” by some other English speakers. Both terms being equally uninformative as to what it actually is…
Malaysians have a terrible habit of using the Latin “cum” too much and redundantly (e.g. “bridge-cum-overpass”), but the worst part is that we actually PRONOUNCE it that way instead of “koom”. I snicker a lot when I listen to newsreaders back home.
Second!
Lame… :/
No, you’re the First Lame.
The First Lame, isn’t that the one we call the Gold Lame?
That’s the one we call Faaaaaaaaaaaaaabulous!
Matt gold? I thought it was shiny.
If you’ve got good enough wrestlers, you can get shiny mat gold.
AAAAARGH! Ghastly memory comes back – was sitting up in the middle of the night unable to sleep after a round of knee surgery, and some not-WWF-anymore came on, and one of the, er, participants was wearing GOLD LAME TIGHTS. TIGHT GOLD LAME TIGHTS. Either that, or someone spray-painted him from the waist down. JEEZUZ SUFFERING FECK I’d forgotten about that – until you reminded me. Pass me the mind bleach, Eunice, before I have one of my funny turns…
Just remember all the health benefits of swallowing!
A Steamboat…hmmm…is that like an “Around the World”, or just a “Half and Half” with a fancy name?
It’s an alternate name for a steam-powered vessel. There are some Mississippi stern-wheelers that would qualify, at least 4 UK preservation vessels (TS Shieldhall, PS Waverley and Kingswear Castle, TS Balmoral), at least one WW2 “Liberty ship” in preservation, and those are just ones I can remember off the top of my head.
Why to you have steamboats on the top of your head?
How else do you expect him to extract the restaurant’s main ingredient?
Well, a steamboat fetish would be a new one on me.
How many old ones do you have?
No, wait, DON’T ANSWER THAT!
The old ones can be found at the Fat Ho Elderly Centre. You can go there and count yourself.
I know I’m repeating myself, but- whatever floats your boat!
It’s the open water version of a Cleveland Steamer!
Be sure to bring a doggie bag of pet’s excrement home after the on-board party!
Yeah, it should go well with the steamboat cum!
There is the joke about what the Bermuda Triange and a dumb blonde have in common….
There is?
er, lots of sailors have gone down there?
It came out of the steamboat…
plowing a deep wake and churning a trail of white foam…
And when the she-boats laid their eggs in it, they eventually hatched into many little dinghies.
I now have a mental image of Sir Davy Attenborough, crouched behind a shrub on a river bank somewhere, earnestly whispering this explanation as the little dinghies hatch, and deploy their oars (which will of course be shed when they are mature) and go rowing off downstream on the spring melt flood to feed off the holidaymakers and fishermen in the river delta, where they will slowly grow up, and then return, when they are fully matured, steaming up river to the mating grounds, where the breeding cycle will begin again.
Ah, the life cycle of the North American Steamboat, the miracle of mother nature. As the dinghies mature, they must constantly watch out for schooners, their main predators. The mother steamboats will return to protect the hatchlings, but they can only do so much.
They must watch for men in their boat decoys… and bears.
Are the bears in the boat decoys, too? Or are there also men in bear decoys? Or do the boat decoys bear men?
The boat decoys have bare men in sheets with a feel that’s never before.
Good huh?
Steamboat cumming ’round the bend!
Steamboat has Peyronie’s disease?
::insert witty remark here::
There was a young man named Brent
With Peyronie’s disease; it was bent.
It did cause some trouble -
It bent around double,
So that instead of coming, he went.
LOL, that would be the SS John Holmes cummin’ round the bend!
Make way!
Watch him so he doesn’t ram the stern.
Funnel-y enough, some women actually let him! I wonder if they got paid enough.
He died of HIV shortly after switching to gay productions. Bad career choice.
“shortly after”? Maybe it wasn’t a guy he caught it from, then.
Actually, it is my understanding that he had always appeared in gay films, more so at the beginning of his career, before he became famous. He was also an IV abuser of cocaine back in the days before they invented crack. Don’t know if he shared needles.
Gives a new meaning to the concept of gettin’ pooped.
or the poop dick.
I’m surprised nobody’s made a Seamen joke yet….or one involving a sperm whale
Yes, the se(a)men from the steamboat could have impregnated a sperm whale. If the whale ate at the restaurant, that is.
As nobody else has said it:
THAR HE BLOWS!
Which could certainly apply if the sperm whale in question was John Holmes.
A giant white sperm whale… srsly, you can’t tell me that Melville didn’t have iss-ews.
His “money shot” was probably a two-bit effort.
If it had been a giant white female sheep, then Melville would have had iss-ewes.
And we could all have concluded that he was from UnZud.
See, the way it works is if you see something nobody has joked about, you joke about it! Give it a try!
Poems, limericks, and haiku are fun. If you don’t have a complete thought, post what you have and others might build on it. This site is like playing with HE in a land fill. It’s fun setting it off and you don’t know what is going to come raining down or from which direction.
Or it could be an Engrish fail, in that it could be correctly used/translated, as Jennifer suggests…less funny, though.
From Wikipedia (that most trusty of sources):
Etymology 1
From Latin cum (“‘with’”).
Preposition
1. Used in indicating a thing with two roles, functions, or natures, or a thing that has changed from one to another.
He built a bus-cum-greenhouse (= he converted a bus to a greenhouse) that made a bold statement, but the plants in it didn’t live very long.
* p. 1926, a. 1950, George Bernard Shaw, Collected Letters: 1926-1950,[1] University of California/Viking (1985), page 31,
He is too good an actor to need that sort of tomfoolery: the effect will be far better if he is a credible mining camp elder-cum-publican.
The elder-cum-publicans don’t belong here. They should be at the Fat Ho Elderly Centre!
Yes, Some Guy, you’re completely right – permit me to join you in your intellectually superior bubble for a minute and and guess that whoever submitted this as Engrish is a cave-living hunch-backed troll who never finished reading in Grade 5 and didn’t recognize ‘cum’ as a Latin word… so yeah, it’s an Engrish FAIL
bubble *pop*
hee hee, cum!
I cum laude’d in college…
who would wanna ride a steamboat in an ocean of well… you know.
I think it would sure beat swimming!
Well, it would probably be a river, actually.
Whitewater rafting, anyone?
It’s ALL rapids at the beginning of that river!
Watch for the major hydraulic circling around the egg!