Pedophiles AND shrimp on drugs?? Shocking!
Mixed
Jork
Jork and cheese
Ham and tomato
HOT DISHES
Loin little plates
Lean of pig with tomato
Veal in country sauce
Octopus to the Galician
You inhabit chid’s overall with ham
Stirred of asparaguses
Potatos tortilla
Bolognan-meat ravioli
Prawns to the pill pill
COLD DISHES
Iberian ham
Submitted by: dunno source via Engrish Funny Submissions
Easy, JohnB, that says chid, not child!
Well, inhabiting a child’s overall with ham is not something I’d necessarily consider abusive, unless the child were Orthodox Jewish, Muslim, or allergic to pork!
I also don’t know what a “chid” is. I do know all about “chads,” thanks to the 2000 US Presidential Election!
I think it’s a result of gene splicing using chickens and dudes.
The result is a “chid.” They are grown for export in third world factory farms, and never see the light of day until they are shipped for slaughter. They are dressed in cast-off clothing from US thrift stores for transport. The meat is considered much like veal, only it tastes like chicken anyway.
You may have a sci fi novel in there…
Soylent chid is people!
The chid’s overall is stuffed with ham, otherwise it would be flavorless.
I prefer eating chiduken
This also explains the Ham of a Warehouse– factory-farming.
*nods*
Perhaps it’s the past tense of chide. I chide you now, you chid me two weeks ago.
True, I did chid you two weeks ago, but before that you had chud me many times.
Do you know how to keep Pedobear away?
These Asians make it too easy!
I’m glad they are using a female sheep’s cheese.
Only the finer restaurants have cheese from the male sheep.
Well, have you ever tried to milk a male sheep?
…
Can we pretend I never said that?
Nope!!! on both counts.
Speaking of milking the male sheep:
http://www.greystoneinn.net/d/20041011.html
Muahahaha.
That’s one link I WON’T click on!
well, it’s actuall a mere female sheep :rofl
“Mere female”? I don’t know how you’ve escaped being pounced upon for a whole week now!
Dahling, going for such an obvious troll is far too infra dig for moi.
*inhabits chi(l)d’s overall*
STFU, HAM!
They get their ham at the warehouse club.
Better a warehouse than a whorehouse!
That’s where you get WOOD, silly!
If you leave there with wood, they certainly didn’t arouse your satisfaction!
Let us read today from the Epistle of Octopus to the Galicians…
I don’t remember that one, and I had a lot of it rammed down my brain at school. Is that the one where St Octopus tells the Galicians that they should take note of Judaism’s law about not eating seafood and follow that example, for vice squid are unclean?
Actually, my grandfather was from Galicia and so he used to recite to us the Epistle from memory, since he had known St. Octopus. It’s apocryphal, however, so it can’t be found in the Bible. But Grampa told it to a young British lad he met named Richard Starkey. Needless to say, Grampa never saw any royalties.
And BTW, Judaic law forbids eating shellfish but not ordinary fish. And my grandfather really did emmigrate from Galicia, which at the time was part of the Austro-Hungarian Empire, but the county of his birth (Sanok) is now part of Poland.
Trivia: The fish must have scales and be predatory. No mud sucking bottom feeders.
Ah, so that’s why jewish people don’t eat politicians.
You just won. Finally, someone who realises that it’s not that only the right wings are evil! There are douchebags all over the political spectrum.
There are many people who realize that. In fact, I dare say it might constitute a majority opinion.
That is true, Rabbi PoodleGroomer. Next time I shall consult my Talmud.
Did you know that there are two Galicias?
The one your grandfather hailed from and the one this menu came from.
it’s the bit of Spain to the north of Portugal.
No, I certainly did not. I know I sound like I say it half jokingly, probably because I say it half jokingly, but this site IS very educational. When I made that riff about the octopus epistle, I was thinking of Galatians, to whom St. Paul did address an epistle.
Did they ever write back?
Those prawns are at their pill pills again, and it’s so hard to find a treatment center that accepts prawns!
At least it’s not squid to pil pil.
If it were, the Vice Squid would have to be called.
Those vice squids with their mustaches…
Some may fall for them, but I’m just not into getting inked.
Maybe if you put on a fake mustache to blend in, they would think you were one of them.
Stuffing a ravioli with bologna? I know it’s under “Hot Dishes,” but it’s still just a cold cut!
It’s not just a cold cut, JohnB, it’s the coldest cut of all.
“You inhabit chid’s overall with ham”
If you inhabit your child’s overalls, you are a PIG
If you inhabit your child’s overalls, you are very small or have a big child!
I really don’t think it’s a good idea to get the asparaguses stirred up!
Why you not think that be good idea?
You never know what an aroused asparagus is capable of!
It’s ok if they are only tips. But if they are asparagus spears..May God have mercy on us all!!
Especially if they team up with the prawns and start taking those pill pills.
Prawns, asparagus, and narcotics. Sounds like a recipe for disaster!
‘Sparagus, prawns and narcotics, oh my,
‘Sparagus, prawns and narcotics, oh my…
I should have said, “Prawns, asparagus, and dope.” Then you’d be singing, “Prawns, asparagus, and dope, doo-dah, doo-dah…”
Your resistance only makes my asparagus harder!!!
Your asparagus only makes my resistance harder! I’d say we were at a Mexican stand-off, but that would be more likely with artichokes.
Did they get the chid’s ham from the warehouse, I wonder…
Bologna Ravioli. I’ll bet it came from the wholesale club in a can, also.
You know, before it was a deli meat, Bologna was city in Italy. Still is, as a matter of fact.
It’s a popular tourist destination, since everyone would like to see buildings constructed of a cheap deli meat.
I think the “pill pill” is supposed to be “pili pili” a.k.a. Piri-Piri. Meaning, made with the extremely hot Birdseye Chili. If you need something to clear out the sinuses, that’ll do nicely.
Okay, and what is Birdseye Chili? I’m not sure I want to know, but I feel compelled to ask the question.
It’s a type of chili pepper, not a dish itself. Small and deceptively very high in capsaicin.
I can vouch for that! I used to grow birdseye chili as decorative plants, and one day I read that they were edible. I like chili, but I made the mistake of adding one chopped birdseye chili to a meal for 2. That’s a mistake I never made again!
OTOH I use 2 or 3 per portion when I’m making a hot curry dish; they are edible!
Now I’m going to have to try it. I love spicy food!
Just be warned; this is pretty savagely hot. For comparison, you could get the same heat from 9 Jalapenos.
I grew some tiny but very hot Thai peppers one year, and I chopped some for some hot chili. The NEXT DAY I made the mistake of putting in a contact lens. I didn’t touch the lenses again for a week, and I washed the one I had put in three times a day! Let me tell you, Capsaicin is NOT for ophthalmic use!!!
Eye peppers are not for the eyes…
lol
I can vouch for that, done it myself once. Contacts and chilies do not make good bedfellows!
Talking about ‘bedfellows’, years later I touched my then-girlfriend after forgetting about the chilies I chopped…
For a short minute she thought: “Wow… he’s never been THAT good.” 30 secs later she was in the shower.
And yes those thai chilies are birdseye chilies.
They are bad but beware of the Scotch Bonnet pepper!
They’re worse and look quite harmlessly like baby bell peppers.
Ah. Scotch Bonnet chilies. If you like Scotch Bonnets, give habaneros a try. Habaneros really aren’t much hotter, but they are fleshier and have a delicious fruity aroma/ flavor. You only get the flavor for a moment… then the endorphin rush sets in.
I love habaneros, but I can’t get them easily enough.
I know I’m in a decent Mexican restaurant when they have habanero sauce out on all the tables! That and when the beef is shredded, not ground.
I eat jalapenos for a snack. I also put them on Pasta. I don’t like things that aren’t spicy, and it is never spicy enough for me. I want some of your peppers, please…
Jalapenos are not that hot, they only score up to 8000 Scoville units.
Scotch Bonnets and Habaneros (same chilies but different strains) score 100 000-350 000.
Luckily where I live there are plenty of jamaican and indian shops selling Scotch Bonnets for about 3 pence each.
You can grow them as well quite easily indoors or out too.
I’d like some of those. You are correct that Jalapenos are not hot, but they taste good, and are sold in big cans.
Meowth is awesome for his love of spices. You might just save Pokémon!
Yay! I’m glad my love of spices can save my fellow Pokémon from… blandness?
There’s a Greek restaurant I’ve been to a couple of times that serves jalapenos and olives as a complmentary appetiser. I eat one olive to remind myself that I still don’t like them, and polish off about 5oz of jalapinos!
I like Olives, too. They aren’t spicy like Jalapenos, but they are good. I like the green ones and the black ones. I like the green ones stuffed with Pimento. If there are any other flavors of Olives, I have not tried them yet.
What is the name of this Greek restaurant, if I might ask?
I can’t remember the name of the restaurant, or of the street it’s in. I find it by dead reckoning from Tottenham Court Road tube, East along the North side of New? Oxford Street, turn left at the second corner after Giotto pizzaria (very good Italian restaurant) and it’s about 50 yards on the left.
Any clues as to the city, state / Provence, and or country?
* and / or
I’m the spanish girl who talked about horchata in another engrish, pil pil it’s a sauce with tomatoe, a bit spicy. But it’s more fun the wrong way!
That would definitely depend on the identity of the pill pills! Some pills are much more fun than others.
I’m still trying to figure out jork and cheese. Is this a dish? Is it a sandwich filling? Is this an idiot wearing a slice of cheddar? Or is it a local colloquialism; “Those two? They’re as different as jork and cheese”?
Neither, it’s jerk made from dorks. In Jamaica they use goat meat, chopped and highly seasoned. This is the same stuff made from slower members of society; it’s the only way to empty the bars at closing time. If you’re passed out in a corner, you run the risk of being “collected.” It’s a culling mechanism that keeps everybody on their toes.
It is dried over an open flame on the beach. Every year they have an annual cooking competition at the big annual jork off.
Maybe I’ll go, sounds like fun!
This site is so educational, it never fails to amaze me.
And it’s so amazing, it never fails to educate me! Sometimes to things I wish I didn’t know…
you can say that agin
I doubt I could.
I just figured it was a misspelling of pork, since they are inhabiting a chi(l)d’s overalls with ham.
I think “jork” is a kind of boiled ham, usually called York.
That could be, but IME spelling a word with a J and pronouncing it Y is mostly a Northern European (particularly Scandanavian) thing, and this menu makes me think of Iberian or Italian cuisine.
Octopus + Galcian = Skies of Arcadia Hentai
How did I know someone was gonna go there…
I think there was a scene in District 9 involving Prawns going to some pill pill. Maybe pill pill is codeword for cat food.
jork jork jork.
sorry had to say it.
And suddenly this menu makes perfecty sense.
It’s the Swedish Chef’s menu!
“Prawns to the pill pill”, indeed.
Yay! “Octopus to the Galician” is my favorite MST3K!
Still don’t know the exact source, but it’s from Europe somewhere, and I don’t think Ireland. The currency symbol beside the prices is for the “Euro”.
It’s seems Spanish. And obviously not Ireland, we speak English.
It’s suposed to be pil pil. It’s supposed to be the sound the tomato sauce makes when it cooking in the pan. It’s a northern Spain dish.
*pil*pil*pil*pil*pil* It’s done. Come and get it.
What were they even trying to get with ‘jork?’
I’m having better luck reading this menu from left to right.
Jajajajajajaja!!!! Jojojojooj!!! It is amazing!!!
They are direct translations from Spanish, done with a computer translator. It is funny after all.
For example:
“Habitas baby con jamón”. Correct: Small ‘baby’ beans with ham.
But “habitas” is also a verb: “habitar” (to inhabit). “habitas” also means “you inhabit”. Put this with ¿child?, and you have the nonsense result.
Better learn Spanish
How did “overall” get into the mix? Could someone have translated “con” as “combination” and then proceeded to mess it up even further?
would you like some Spam with your Jork?
~~~~~~Shudder~~~~~~
What a waste of perfectly good jork.
This place the same as Bacon of Sky. Are be it so?
I’m surprised nobody commented on the lean of pig. I’d think this must be a pig from West Virginia…
i do like my jork and cheese
Pil Pil is a vasque sauce made out of olive oil, garlic and the gelatine of the cod fish as a result of a 15 m wavering of the pan. No tomatoe in it! Congratulations for the web. I can’t stop laughing. Here you are another brilliant mistake in a spanish menu: “Rape in catalan style” (“rape” is “monkfish”).